I met up with Erin in the Chelsea neighborhood, along the iconic 5th Avenue. After a short wait, we got a seat at Ootoya (OH-toh-yah). The interior was softly lit, and had plenty of tables as well as counter seating, with views into the kitchen. Sliding doors with wooden slats and paper covered lights gave the space the feeling of a traditional Japanese izakaya.

The menu is pretty extensive, offering several options from robata grilled chicken (yakitori) to noodles and sushi. Ootoya’s speciality is teishoku, Japanese meal sets, usually consisting of a main entree, rice, miso soup, and assorted side dishes, often pickled vegetables.

We ordered tea, and both ordered variations of Japanese hambaagu or “hamburg steak” (not to be confused with hamburger). Hambaagu is made from ground beef (sometimes mixed with pork), with chopped onions, egg, bread crumbs, and sometimes other ingredients like miso. Its served on a plate, rather than as a sandwich, and is much lighter and fluffier than an American hamburger. Erin ordered the traditional demi-glace sauce version, while I ordered the ponzu hambaagu.

While we waited, Erin and I talked about life and work. She told me something interesting that struck me, she told me she believed that “life is long,” — a direct opposition to the traditional notion that life is short. On this she said:

“I think so often young people are rushed to be someone, be big, be famous,” she said, “be exactly who and what they dream to be right now. It’s like there’s a lot of eyes watching us to be great. But I try to remind myself that it takes time to fulfill your dreams and that I don’t have to want to grow up to be one thing—like a doctor or astronaut or teacher. I can be many things. But to be many things or any things I try to remember it takes time. maybe I’m not living my “dreams” right now but that’s so totally ok because it’s the journey of everything that is rich, not about the destination. In this day and age, whatever is the destination, it will always be changing because life moves and is fluid and takes time, lots of it. so instead of the classic ‘life is short; you only live once,’ now my philosophy is, ‘you only live once; life is long,’ —and I feel much more comfortable accepting and loving who and where I am knowing that fact.”

I found this viewpoint refreshing. We drank roasted tea, talked about other thing and had a wonderful dinner.

—For the record, the ponzu hambaagu set meal was amazing, and I can’t recommend it enough!

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